Game Thread of Existential Despair: Blue Jays at Braves, June 22

It’s like living in a Beckett play.  Waiting For Sosa, perhaps.  It’s nice that we have a new Theoretical Closer, though.

354 thoughts on “Game Thread of Existential Despair: Blue Jays at Braves, June 22”

  1. Laroche for Esteban German
    They need a 1b, we need leadoff left fielder:

    100 AB, 16 Runs, 31 Hits, .310 avg., .405 obp

    This guy doesn’t even get to play in KC, now especially after getting Gathright.

  2. Wow, amazingly good call on the Beckett. I’m looking through scripts now, finding lots of things that sum up our situation wonderfully:

    VLADIMIR:
    And they didn’t beat you?
    ESTRAGON:
    Beat me? Certainly they beat me.
    VLADIMIR:
    The same lot as usual?
    ESTRAGON:
    The same? I don’t know.

  3. In an NBA-related vein, I am going to be following the Knicks next year. A team with Isiah Thomas as coach AND GM will suck at historic levels. This is going to be great! I can’t believe they actually did that!

  4. Yeah, I’d say the fact that the players are happy with the move (ESPN reports) is not a good sign for Knicks fans. I mean, Stephon Marbury’s happiness doesn’t depend on anything more than his own good stats. Winning is irrelevant to him.

    I’m surprised Knicks fan David Sterm even allowed this. Isiah may well be dead in the next few days.

  5. By the way, Mac, at what point did we pass through Angst on our way into Despair? Which game/series served as the transition?

  6. Okay I’m pretty new to this game thread, but I commit to help out. My player to get straightened is Laureen Wanda Jones aka chipper! I have gone all out to get her back to the MAN she once was. We have went back to 1999 mvp season, watching game films, eating habits, pregame rituals so look out! Just for added insurance I have started him on a special medicinal regiment that contains Viagra/ginkgo bliobo /Exlax this concoction will do the following: 1 put a little pop in his stick 2 help him remember that he’s in the Majors 3 get his A** moving again. Just in case you’re wondering I have consulted with Jose Consaeco and he assured me this will pass MLB performance enhancement guidelines. So after tonight’s game you will understand his dual urge to get home!!!
    So no autographs please
    Go Braves
    Play ball, Sincerely Keith

  7. this shouldn’t be allowed here……

    “Viagra/ginkgo bliobo /Exlax this concoction will do the following: 1 put a little pop in his stick”

    Viagra, stick, Chipper shouldn’t be in the same paragraph.

  8. We’re all trying whatever we can. I applaud the effort, even if it still doesn’t make ‘cents’.

  9. Existential despair… wow. But it fits. I like the 5-4 rainout win concept though. That is something we just might be able to pull off plus it has the advantage that it wouldn’t require going to the bullpen assuming HoRam doesn’t get hit in the face again.

  10. I doubt anyone else wants him, so I’m taking Paronto again tonight. I really felt like he just needed to take his mind off the game tonight, so we sat down together and played a game of Scrabble.

    He drew K early in the game and, with a rack of EIKRSST, he couldn’t figure out what to play. I showed him how to lay STRIKES across a triple word score space for 85 points, putting us out to a commanding lead. Since I’m trying to get him to keep leads, I pulled him out of the game while he was ahead. He seems like he’s in a pretty good mood!

  11. Perhaps we should try the Billy Martin method & write the lineup by pulling names from a hat.

    Perhaps we should give HoRam a Dock Ellis dose.

    Perhaps we should pull an Eddie Gaedel & send up Peter Dinklage to hit for Francouer. At least he’ll take a walk.

    Perhaps we can snag the lead by the 5th & have Chief Nocahoma do a real rain dance.

    Perhaps we can unleash Shiva to destroy our enemies.

    Perhaps we can win one lousy game; I’m starting to get Rick Matula flashbacks.

  12. Mac,
    I’ve been out and about for a few days– can’t quite face up to reading about these Braves. So, who is this theoretical closer that you speak of?

  13. Charles, they’d have to be idiots to make that trade. But if they’re playing Gathright over German, they are idiots.

    My guys Langerhans and Villareal are ready, if they ever get to play. I’m telling you, I have them psyched.

  14. No Giles tonight.

    Betemit
    Renteria
    C. Jones
    A. Jones
    McCann
    Francoeur
    LaRoche
    Thorman
    Ramirez

  15. Brian J: but what did you do to get them psyched?

    When VIllareal is pumped, does he circle around the ballpark waiting for his opportunity?

  16. Well, yesterday they were watching the World Cup.

    Today I told Carmen that he’d have a good chance for another win because HoRam wasn’t likely to stay around long. As for Langerhans, I told him that if he plays well, we’ll send someone else to Richmond instead of him.

    Villareal like the throw baseballs at random people when he’s psyched. Which, come to think of it, isn’t that different from the rest of the time….

  17. Strange day. I wake up, turn on the TV and the U.S. is losing to the Atlanta Hawks.

    Weird, huh?

    (actually, Ghana’s other jerseys are even more Hawk-like)

  18. I think we would look a lot better if we just conceded the ballgame instead of playing it. We show up there in our uniforms and really make the effort to look like we want to play, but prior to the start of the game, Cox just comes out of the dugout and tells the Ump, “Piss on it…we know the outcome, so we are going to head to the bars for some beer.”

    Most of the fans will think we could have won, and we will all be in a better mood.

  19. I’m slightly interested to see how many more ways Mac can come up with to say “bad” in the game thread titles. But that would require a much longer losing streak.

    No Marcus tonight? He didn’t tell me. He was too busy pouring Ivory dish soap into the clubhouse toilet tanks so lavender-scented bubbles overwhelmed the room every time it flushed. Funny guy. But that means I can relax tonight, or maybe start unfounded trade conspiracy theories.

  20. Ok… Braves win tonight and sweep Tampa Bay. The rest of the divison will go in a tailspin. Then we play the Spankees… well im trying to be positive, so ill stop there. I talked to my “adopt-a-Brave” Thor, he said he will hit a HR for us tonight.

  21. I have two thesauruses. Thesaurii? Whatever.

    Anyway, looks like it’s raining in Atlanta right now, but is supposed to be done by gametime. Recap probably in the morning rather than tonight.

  22. There are so many things going on these threads right now, and just about all of them are more interesting than anything the Braves have done lately. Literary references, the possibility of New York being enveloped in riots, plans for rain dances… it’s all happening.

  23. Jenny that was f’in funny (Marcus and the soap), i spit out my grape soda…now i gotta changes shirts.

  24. Rain’s gone, so away we go.

    (Adapted from the Muppet Show opening)

    It’s time to play the music
    It’s time to light the lights
    It’s time to meet the Muppets here on TBS tonight

    It’s time to put on makeup
    It’s time to dress up right
    It’s time to raise the curtain on the Bullpen Show tonight.

    Why do we always come here
    I guess we’ll never know
    It’s like a kind of torture
    To have to watch the show!

    And now let’s get things started
    Oh, must you get things started?
    ‘Fraid so, let’s get things started
    On the unsensational despirational exasperational BlueJay-sational
    This is what we call the Bad Braves Show!

    (Bobby Cox hits the gong and explodes)

  25. Thanks a heap, Chipper. Keep eating away at what’s left of your goodwill here.

  26. So the guys at BP said that the hallmark of a good team struggling is that every lost game looks like a repeat of the same movie. It’s one flaw that can be fixed. They said the Braves, therefore, were truly bad because they were finding all kinds of ways to lose, like the Royals. But Chip/Skip just compared our games to “Groundhog Day.” So what does this mean? Who’s right? I’m confused now.

    Nice throw, Frenchy.

  27. I’ve gotta go with BP. Skip and Chip didn’t suggest a single bad thing common to our losses, mostly because the only real commonality is a rotten bullpen, and we’ve lost many of these games well before those arsonists arrived.

    They only suggested that it’s discouraging to announce another loss, which is true enough.

    BTW, thank you Frenchy and HoRam.

  28. Wow, I can’t believe HoRam got out of that inning without giving up runs. That’s magic!

  29. JP Ricciardi’s Folly is pitching? Wow, I thought he was still on the DL.

    Nice play.

  30. yeah, Chipper has not looked good at all this year…although he is something like .500 against AJ Burnett.

  31. Oh sweet Lord we’re not losing!…..yet…

    I can’t take much more of this. I’m turning into Randy Quaid’s character from Major League 2

  32. The Braves are beginning to lend themselves well to Misting- talking back to the game and commentary a la Mystery Science Theater 3000. How long until Skip and Pete figure this out? When they do, the broadcasts are going to get much more entertaining.

  33. a theory of why the braves are playing so terrible:

    so i know they aren’t great this year, but still, i never thought we would be getting swept by the marlins bad. watching chipper look at strike 3 last inning it occurred to me, maybe the braves (or at least some braves) are trying to tank these games to scare liberty off from buying them. knowing that the organization ain’t gonna be in great shape for a while if that happens, perhaps the team is trying to lower their value so liberty backs off and someone like blank can swoop in.

    at least thinking of it that way makes me a little less sad.

    an idea anyway

  34. Yeah, not a bad AB there by Frenchy. He worked the count and, despite what Skip said, he didn’t actually strike out on a bad pitch; he just shouldn’t have been trying to pull it.

    Now, LaRoche just struck out on a bad pitch.

  35. They are playing like the USA soccer team – absolutely no confidence. Decidedly un-Brave-like.

  36. Even if he pitches out of trouble, he’s pitching out his arm which means one thing……..bullpen. Help us. Stop the bleeding.

  37. Retisma needs to be duct taped to a pole in his underwear and beaten with soap wrapped in a towel….his DL stint is officially numbmess in 2 fingers on his hand, actually I have it on good authority that it is numbness from the neck up.

  38. BTW, Stu….McCann is actually further out of the voting than Andruw, Edgar, and Chipper. (!)

  39. Well, I know McCann won’t be voted in, but he’s a lock (assuming he doesn’t get hurt again) to be taken as a back-up. I’d think both Renteria and Andruw have decent shots (though not to be voted in), the main thing hurting them is that no one would want to see 3 guys from a team this bad on the All-Star team. My guess is Edgar’s gonna be the odd man out. We’ll see, I suppose.

  40. Okay. If 8 seconds could tell the story of a season, it would be this short video:

  41. Yeah I’d pretty much say that Francoeur clip pretty much does an excellent job of summing up the reason. Now where’s the Judy Reitsma clip of him bent over at the knees in Houston.

  42. Well, seeing as how this thread isn’t so lively this evening, I’m going to step out for dinner. Don’t let this one get away, folks.

  43. Pete showing that the Chop House is displaying a banner commemorating the Braves in the 1970s.

    I wasn’t around then, but was there ANYTHING at all worth celebrating during that decade. OK, the three guys hitting 40 HR each in 1973, but what else?

  44. Interesting scenario-the future of the franchise here, in 4 straight batters, with 1 out, runners on 1st and 2nd. McCann; Frenchie; LaRoche; Thormond. Who steps up? who doesn’t?

  45. Existential Despair–the Braves have produced Sartrean Nausea all season long. However, when it comes a closer our late innings for much of the season (especially when it seemed to matter) have been characterized by`No Exit’.

    Some runs!! Now the fun begins….

  46. To repeat from last night- the Braves have scored in 42 innings in June. Two of those were in the 9th inning when losing, and the other team didn’t bat again. They have allowed 31 runs in the other 40 succeeding innings.

  47. It seems like when Wilson starts…

    he hits at least 1 double.. might only be just my view though..

  48. Betemit has started 23 games and hit 10 doubles in those starts (both including tonight).

  49. TBS said before tonight, of the last 8 times they’ve scored, they’ve given up a run in the next inning. Suck.

  50. Anyone else stunned at HoRam’s 5 k’s through 5? He looks nothing like the pitcher from last year. I sure don’t trust him as a top-shelf guy or anything, but games like this definitely put him in the ‘serviceable’ category…

  51. Alex, actually the whole left side of the infield can squat…which is why Mac wants at least Tony Pena playing at shortstop.

  52. It’s such a comfortable feeling listen to Ship and Pete instead of the Rathburn and Torborg…

  53. Life during a losing streak- A body at rest, like our tarp, is in the wrong place.

  54. 7 hits and 6 walks in 6.1 innings. there are going to be nights when that will put a lot bigger dent in the ERA than what happended tonight.

  55. The best part about Tyra Yates is she only used 1 pitch so maybe she can pitch a successful 8th?

    Would the Braves at least consider INSURANCE RUNS?

  56. bfan, on a nine-game losing streak, I wouldn’t be picky on those kind of stuff. I just want to see a win.

  57. Who are we calling Rocker? That’s a terrible thing to say about a person, even one of our bullpen girls.

  58. Alex, I am sure it will be Remlinger in the eighth and Ray in the ninth…what are their first names?

  59. I understand and agree; I just want to caution everyone that some corner has not been turned by HoRam here; he rolled double play balls; guys got caught stealing; and so on. Good for him, but not some new level of skill.

  60. you know, other than 0.58 ERA Ryan, the guys in the Blue Jays bullpen have horrible ERAs. Can we get some runs while we are ahead, so we can weather the storm that will come later, and we don’t later get behind?

  61. Good. (I have a sister named Lisa, BTW.) As bad as these folks have been pitching, the insanity Rocker caused in his last 18 months in Atlanta was more damaging to the team- especially since his pitching also deteriorated badly during that time.

  62. diving catch missed, quick throw in caught thorman between first and second but the guy dropped getting it out of his glove and he made it to 2nd

  63. bfan, I disagree about HoRam. I think McDowell’s done a little something with him (talked him out of throwing whatever pitch it was that kept leaving the yard). True, it wasn’t a particularly good outing, but he hasn’t really had a bad one except for the game where he got hit in the head.

  64. Landogarner, Marcus can advance the runner if Bobby will let him swing. Seriously, I still love Marcus.

  65. Wasn’t a good outing?????? Giving up only one run is fucking great. Clemens gave up two runs in his game tonight.

  66. I meant with the peripherals, as bfan was referring to. Sure, he kept them off the scoreboard, but the line looked a bit like Sosa last year. Lots of baserunners, no runs.

  67. Too bad Clemens is pitching against Liriano. Boy, Santana and Liriano, that’s unreal.

  68. Yeah they are unreal. I’m going to watch a Twins game next month when they play Detroit. Not sure what pitchers are going against each other but I would love to see Verlander vs Santana.

  69. Way to take pitches, guys. Maybe we should look at film of how the Red Sox kicked our butts and start noticing a pattern: patience at the plate. Jeez.

  70. First batter of the inning gets to third with only one out and we can’t get him home……. This is why we lose games.

  71. make that 4.

    I hate Cox.

    This loss will also be his fault. Clearly Tyra was feeling good and threw ONE pitch.

    So take him out.

    This will be YOUR FAULT, BOBBY, YOU OLD FART.

  72. i would say give bobby credit for taking him out, but he’s putting in remlinger…that might actually be worse

  73. I can’t believe I actually believe in Remlinger, but it should be Remlinger to start the inning. He pitches better against righties than lefties anyway.

  74. and hear comes my least favorite Brave, MARY FREAKING REMLINGER.

    BOBBY:

    READ THE GODDAMNED SPLITS YOU MORON, HE GETS RIGHTIES OUT BETTER THEN LEFTIES. ARRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

  75. what a shocker.

    Overbay, the guy who has killed us all night gets a hit against an old, crappy pitcher who throws bigger meatballs to lefties but inexplicably, you have an 86 year old manager, who refuses to check stat sheets, EVER, and hence the game has been tied now.

    This is Bobby Cox’s fault. If pollyanna boy wants to come in here and rip me, go ahead. This is Cox’s fault. read a STAT SHEET….ARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

    NO ONE ELSE TO BLAME BUT COX FOR THIS, NO ONE ELSE. AND REMLINGER SHOULDNT HAVE A JOB.

  76. And once again, Remlinger fails. Honestly, does Bobby just not pay attention to what happens when Remlinger pitches?

    Last 11 outings (including tonight): 7 IP, 13 H, 4 R, 4 ER, 4 BB, 4 K, 1 game-losing error.

  77. what the f— was Remlinger doing on THAT play?

    WHY WAS TYRA YATES NOT LEFT IN THIS GAME???? WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY?

  78. Sigh….this bullpen will never be good enough to cover Bobby’s major weaknesses: late innings and bullpen management.

  79. if he EVER plays paronto or remlinger again he is more of a FREAKIN IDIOT than i ever thought

  80. Alex, he was going to throw to third to show Bobby that he doesn’t screw up every time he touches the ball. Fortunately, his one functioning brain cell remembered what happened last time he did that.

  81. Cox, this is tired. You are tired. Go away, old man. I am done saying anything nice. I have had it. This has got to be the straw that breaks the camels back. Yates should have stayed in the f-ng game and he would have probably pitched a good inning, and we might, MIGHT have held the 9th for the win.

    I am so damned tired of this. I can’t stand it. This is 100% Cox’s fault. I quit, I cant do this anymore…I can’t get my hopes up that this streak will end and then Cox’s inane in game decision making comes into play. I am fed up.

    Where is Schuerholz????

    Signing his damned book at the North gate probably, that suspender wearing phony. Go sign another book…he could can test his ink pen on those stat sheets, BOBBY NEVER LOOKS AT.

    arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggggggggggggggg

  82. we can also thank chipper and reneteria for getting us that third run last inning…oh wait

  83. I am actually glad to hear booing of the bullpen. Let them boo. And cheer sarcastically. It’s time to get people’s attention.

  84. It’s ok Alex. We have been seeing the same thing in the last 15 years. The way Bobby manages shouldn’t be a surprise anymore…

  85. it must be pretty cramped in that house, they should get smoltz and home depot to put on a couple of additions

  86. honestly, what would it take for him to cut Mary…does he have to run into the stands and beat up bobby’s wife? what would it take??

  87. Carmen needs to get up in Bobby’s grill. Watching Mary fail and Chelsea fail and Renee fail and Tyra fail, and he can’t get one pitch in?

  88. This must be really frustrating for the starting pitchers who continue to lose wins.

  89. Umm – Yates sucks. Yes, Paranto/Remlinger/Ray (hopefully Kenny stops the Jays up) have not performed, but Yates has NO history of success. Again, it’s not like Bobby has any good options on hand.

  90. I want to personally take a fracking Hummer and DRIVE IT OVER REMLINGER AND PARONTO AND VILLAREAL so those 3 pieces of crap never pitch another day in a Braves uniform.

    Horacio pitches his freaking ARSE off and this is how Cox repays him? By sticking Paronto and Remlinger in?

    I hate him. I dont care anymore that Cox was nice to my dad and me in 1995…that was 11 yrs ago and its 2006 he’s old and tired and he has got to retire.

    Carrot Top could manage the Braves better. Corky from “Life Goes On” could manage the Braves better.

  91. Call me crazy but at this point I’d really like to finish with the worst record and get the #1 pick in the Draft. We won’t sniff the wild card, so does it really matter anyway?

  92. is it illegal to set up someone to break mary and carmen and chelsea’s legs so that they cant pitch anymore?

  93. I am not saying I like Yates.

    On a good Braves team, he’s in Richmond’s bullpen.

    But the man came in and threw ONE PITCH IN THE 7TH.

    Hell, let the man have the 8th? Who knows but anything is better then Chelsea GRYBOSKI and his fracking walks and then even worse, MARY Remlinger….WHO CANT GET LEFTIES OUT, BOBBY. HE HASNT ALL YEAR. NOT A ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!

  94. Another thing: Why the hell was the infield back?!?!? You HAVE TO CUT DOWN THE GO AHEAD RUN NOT WAIT FOR A TAYLOR MADE DOUBLE PLAY BALL YOU MOTHERF-ING BLITHERING IMBECILE.

  95. Alex, regardless of who YOU think should be in the game, it’s not like there’s a head-and-shoulders pick to bring someone out of the bullpen. You can sit there and criticize these moves after the fact, and even get lucky before the fact, but the fact of the matter is that it’s not Bobby’s fault he’s bringing in crap. It’s all he’s got.

  96. I love the way Remlinger always throws down his water bottle when he’s ready to exit the bullpen, like some cocky frat boy.

  97. It sucks for both HoRam and Kenny Ray, who got a ground ball and no DP was turned, thus probably giving him the L.

    I only wish I was there to boo as well. Normally I don’t like to boo my own team, but in this case, it is well deserved. These are the worst pitchers I have ever seen. It has almost become a certainty that they will fail, which, when you consider the fact that even the best hitters make outs 70% of the time, is kind of remarkable. So I will have to confine it to here.

    BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

  98. alex, yates would have had to bat 2nd that inning…thats why he wanted HoRam to make it for the last out…there was no way he lets yates bat after thorman’s double…..but its not like we got the run anyway

  99. jenny,

    good point. They’re almost statistically impossible bad. It’s almost kind of funny if it weren’t so sad.

  100. Rob, just let Alex vents. Bobby doesn’t know his relievers well. That’s a fact. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out Remlinger can’t get lefties out.

  101. Jenny, this is where you should be. Financially supporting the Braves right now is subsidizing failure. Braves fans should boycott the park until improvement is made- improvement being canning Cox and at least half a dozen players.

  102. Rob,

    In fairness…I hear ya.

    But if we are judging this craptastic team night to night, then clearly Yates was on tonight so hell, he threw 1 pitch…would it have KILLED Cox to leave him in?

    I mean, if he pulls a PARONTO and walks the first guy, fine, take him out…but after his solid 7th, he deserved the 8th.

    Thats all.

  103. I just can’t imagine what it would be like having to try to cheer for teams like this year after year like fans of the Reds, Rays, Royals, etc. Kinda gives you a different perspective…

  104. Bobby has his weaknesses, but of course it’s still the fault of JS for giving Bobby this bullpen.

  105. Yes…to be fair, we can argue the merits of Yates vs. Paronto, but if there’s one thing both Mac and I have been screaming through our computers about all year….Remlinger cannot, at all, unequivocably, get any lefties out…ever.

    Bobby, for the love of everything holy and good, please, all that is holy…READ A STAT SHEET.

    Remlinger. no. to. lefties.

  106. Yeah, I’m sure Bobby had nothing to do with bringing Jordan & Remlinger back. Gimmie a break.

  107. Marlins just scored the go-ahead run in the 10th because Miguel Cabrera stepped forward and swung at an IBB pitch and hit a single.

  108. so in the marlins game, the orioles were trying to IBB miguel cabrera, so the pitcher lobs up softball over the plate, and cabrera drops it in center, scoring the leading run in the top of the 10th. pretty funny.

  109. kc, yes…but Bobby’s in game managing is right now, the worst in Baseball.

    No one…not one Manager brings in Paronto and Remlinger. Not one.

  110. Jeremy,

    100% accurate. 100%. Jordan beat out Jurries in March because of two words: Bobby Cox

    Mary Remlinger beat out Kevin Barry and several others in March because of two words: Bobby Cox

  111. It’s ok Alex. On a potential 10-game losing streak, we can pretty much point fingers at anyone and say it’s his fault…except McCann.

  112. Last team to blow more saves than they converted- the 2002 Cubs (saved 23, blew 25). The Braves have new saved 15 and blown 15.

  113. Alex, pick your poison. He doesn’t have anyone else to bring in. He’s just sending out the crap that JS is sending to him. Personally, the book thing is a little stretched, because there’s really no one available for him to get assuming he is trying to make deals.

  114. Land,

    It’s a riddle…how many Braves does it take to screw in a light bulb?

    Two.

    It’s Francouer and LaRoche because they quickly got through their at bats swinging at the first pitch so they could deal with the damned light bulb problem.

    (ok, that was dumb but I am really pissy).

  115. Jeff will come through. May be a hit, may be a sac fly, but the streak ends tonight /endSmittyChannelling

  116. No one…not one Manager brings in Paronto and Remlinger. Not one.

    In all fairness, most of them don’t have that crap in their bullpen.

  117. Argh. Popup to short right. At some point, we need to stop trying to parody the Braves- they’ll beat our parodies every time.

  118. this would be the second inning in a row we get a runner to third with 1 out and cant score

  119. Tyler Yates was not “effective.” He threw one pitch that was absolutely crushed, it just happened to be crushed right at Andruw.

    I’m with Rob. While Bobby makes mistakes, he simply has nothing to work with here.

  120. Rob,

    You are right…I am beating the “book” thing and I am venting…I just hate this “grabbing a loss from the jaws of defeat” thing.

    And while I agree we have crapola in the bullpen, Yates should have stayed in or else go to Stockman…but not Paronboski or Remlin-junk.

  121. guys forget the staying with yates thing…he was not going to bat 2nd with thor on 2nd….but there is never an excuse for chelsea or mary

  122. Frenchy needs to be told that, the next time he makes an out by swinging at the firstpitch, someone’s going to hit his HEAD to f***ing Denmark.

  123. Fine…if some of you think Yates is worse then Paronboski and Remlin-junk, your call. I think Yates is better.

    (yes…its like saying syphillis is better then Ghonnorea).

    So then why not Sarah Stockman?

    The only other option as equally bad as those 2 is Carmen.

    All three players should be off the team, completely. gone. finito.

  124. Actually, the reason why the Braves will lose tonight is because they can score with runners on third with one out in the seventh and in the eighth.

    We can drop the Yates/Paronto/Remlinger arugment now.

  125. Rob, Stu-

    Would you guys at least throw me a “bone” and agree that Mary, Carmen and Chelsea should all be off the team and find ANY 3 guys in Richmond at this point? Any?

  126. I’m speechless (fortunately, I can still type). This is just godawful bad. At this point, I think McCann is the only guy I wouldn’t trade from this team.

  127. Essentially, I have figured out a sure fire way we can win a game…we need a starter to be able to survive throwing 200 pitches.

  128. a 10 game, winless homestand is looming.

    At what point to several veterans strt getting their final walking papers?

    What in G-ds name will it take?

  129. Matt,

    As we have pointed out previously…the Braves are the team that is the cure for everyone’s ills.

    We will get swept in Tampa.

  130. does bobby really think that all of a sudden remlinger and jordan and vulture and chelsea and pratt are gonna wake up one day and be great? is he THAT senile?????????

  131. Enough with the stadium sound effects. I’m not even there and they’re driving me mad.

    Nice catch, Druw.

  132. Jenny,

    You now the sound affect that bugs me the most?

    Bobby’s “c’mon fill in the blank nickname”.

    Maybe the old man needs to get in someone’s grill already.

    This pollyanna crap is sickening. Cut some bad players, yell at some players…but do something, anything different.

    because a 10 game, winless homestand is completely unacceptable. This is not a Professional Baseball team.

    And Bobby just sits there and says and does nothing. And JS does nothing…no one cares but the people on this site. And that, above all, upsets me the most about this 2006 team.

  133. Andruw will be in the lineup tomorrow like he always is. Chumper would be out a month if he took a fall like that.

  134. If I am one of those kids being younger than 15 years old, I wouldn’t know how to react.

  135. You know, I don’t get to see very many games. I guess it takes more to get pissed off just checking scores every morning. It sure seems to be more painful watching failure blossom in real time. Maybe it’s also because I remember the Braves of the 80s (oddly enough, I seem to be remembering them a lot better lately).

  136. Jeremy, that’s why I love Andruw, regardless whether he struggles or not. Just his attitude is awesome.

    Why bothers, just let McDowell pitches.

  137. Forget 15, kc, anybody slightly older than that doesn’t know how to react, either. I’m 18 and I don’t have any memories of anything like this. It’s totally alien and weird.

  138. Well, Andrew was grabbing at his, uh, private parts as he walked back out to center. Maybe just, uh, dis-lodged something.

  139. Andruw busts his butt, that’s for sure. He’s back to his normal, non-2005 level of production (projecting to a career high in RBIs), still playing almost every inning, and still providing good defense.

    He’s someone you keep. And if someone is going to get in this team’s face, it’s gotta be him. He’s the closest thing to a team leader the Braves have. He proved it last year. We need him to prove it again.

  140. maybe francouer really wants to be like dale murphy and be on so many bad braves teams…seems eerily familiar

  141. Jayekan,

    If ‘Druw dislodged something, the Hooters and strip club population of Atlanta will be extremely disappointed.

  142. Yeah Billy, I remember in 1990 when I would be asking “When the Braves will win 40 games?” “When the Braves will win 50 games?” I didn’t even bother to look how games the Braves were back from first place.

  143. Yes, Langerhans! That’s the way to hustle! Now steal second before Marcus wipes you out!

  144. wow…the kind of hustle I just saw from langy should be infectious…I wish it was. Chipper and LaRoche should watch the way Langy just acted. Great job, kid.

  145. langerhans steals on an awful jump…marcus takes a strike and langy is out by 6 feet

  146. Langerhans just got thrown out by 10 feet trying to steal second. Someone missed a sign, either Langy or Marcus.

  147. I’d like to see us go into extra innings and then lose it.

    You just can’t suffer enough as a braves fan.

  148. Diaz. Now there’s someone who knows how to hit. Yet we have Francoeur & his -1,878,980.45 VORP in the lineup EVERY SINGLE DAY!

  149. Ten stright. Tampa ho. If Schuerholz were still alive, some of these guys wouldn’t get plane tickets.

  150. Whoever adopted Brian McCann needs to go give the kid a hug, he looks like he’s going to cry. And he’s the last one who should be blamed for any of this crap.

  151. “Chipper The Rally Killer” comes through again. Can someone photoshop a picture of like the Rally Monkey with Chipper or something?

  152. I wish we had more double headers, because I am no longer satisfied with just one loss a night. I now need two losses a night to get the same dose of misery that I used to get with one loss.

  153. we finally get 3 hits against ryan, and its STILL not enough!!! good freaking grief!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

  154. Schuerholz is currently in his gold fleece bath tub bathing himself in 55 copies of his book and drinking champaign. Someone is currently texting him the results of the game.

  155. Billy, McCann can call all the pitches he wants, but those pitchers will not be able to locate the pitches.

  156. I think Brian McCann needs to be awarded the Medals of Valour and Honor for not having tied up, gagged and beaten his 23 teammates and his Manager.

    McCann’s Cans deserve better.

  157. Yeah, kc said it. Whoever thinks McCann is calling for these meatballs is out of their minds. Like it matters what they throw.

  158. kc,

    Joke, man. I’ve got nothing bad to say about McCann. In fact, I feel sorry for him as he has the “best” seat in the house when he sees those fat pitches coming in.

  159. I remember an ad for some state’s lottery a few years ago. The catcher is squatting there as the other team tees off, he rubs off a scratch-and-win card, finds out he’s a winner, and runs off the field- just in time for the next pitch not to be hit and nail the umpire.

    Did anyone else here see this ad? Because McCann’s reminding me of that guy.

  160. Poor guy can call for good stuff all he wants, but that doesn’t mean he’s going to get it:

    “Okay, how about a vintage Randy Johnson slider right here? NO.NO.NO. Not the batting practice one…”

  161. Actually, Billy, I bet all the pitches look the same from McCann’s view, no matter he calls for a fastball, changeup, slider, curveball, or whatever.

  162. As Pi Patel says in the Life of Pi, “My suffering left me sad and gloomy.” This too shall pass.

  163. Did you see where they got an AlQuida guy in Atlanta? Maybe he is why we were loosing. Maybe we could have used him as a set up guy. I bet those Blue jay hitters would have been intimidated by a guy with some explosives straped to his chest.

  164. I’d suggest that, Smitty, but making someone pitch for the Braves right now probably violates the Geneva Conventions.

  165. So Brian,
    “These guys are terrorist, they are not prisoners of war.”
    -Rumsfeld

    ha ha ha! The only time you can quote a political person on this site and it be ok!

  166. You would think we’d accidently win one at some point…

    (Okay, I’m 18 as well and have no clue what has just happened for the last three weeks. I think I’ve been tuning into the wrong team.)

    I “adopted” McCann, and just left a message on his cell phone to remind him he can’t do it alone. Of course, his predicament is only being a second-year player who can’t start yelling at his veteran teammates who all of a sudden forgot how to play.

    I also told him that it’s cool he and Frenchy are buddies and all, but he really needs to raise his rent everytime Frenchy hits a pop-up with a man on third and less than two outs, or strikes out with a man anywhere. I mentioned he needs to endlessly remind Frenchy who has more steals and tell him he won’t let off until Frenchy starts helping him carry this offense. (Smitty, you might want to warn Jeff that is coming.)

  167. Dman ‘Rissa!

    Frenchy said he just missed on that pitch and feels bad.

    I can’t afford his rent and mine. I am still looking for that post grad job…

  168. Also, I firmly believe the Braves sit around in the clubhouse before the games discussing ways to lose. I mean, that ninth inning was very bizarre. Of course, truth is stranger than fiction so maybe even they couldn’t come up with this stuff.

    Okay, everyone in the world (or, everyone who knows what a baseball is) knows the Braves bullpen will blow the lead. No surprise there. But, the cool thing about the bottom of the ninth is if you go ahead then, the bullpen isn’t involved. So, what happens tonight? Someone misses a sign or gets confused, or something, and Langy is out by a mile at second. Then what was technically ball four to Marcus was called strike two (it looked like a ball to me, and Marcus obviously thought it was one too). So, where it really ought to have been men on first and second, nobody out, there was two outs. Right now, only the Braves could manage that (okay ,the Royals might be pretty good at it too, but I really don’t see enough of them to be an expert). Okay, I do have to insert that it was Marcus’ fault that he struck out, but he can’t help it that he can’t sit still long enough to listen to Jenny’s motivational speeches or that he should have been on first but he was still in the batter’s box. Naturally there are back-to-back singles, so at the bare minimum it should have been a tie game. Chipper’s line drive was hit hard enough that it would have been a sac fly and we would have won on that, if we hadn’t already. So, you see, they really are coming up with rather creative ways to lose, even with the predictable bullpen explosion.

  169. The failure to get real help for the pen has to be a plot to get JS, Jr to the big leagues–as a relief pitcher. At this point, he might actually be an improvement.

  170. I have a question about trades

    what big league teams are trading right now?

    That is why we aren’t getting anyone

  171. Unfortunately, Smitty, I think all the activity, if there is any, is going to come very close to the deadline, when we’re just hopelessly buried (if we aren’t now). And it’ll be expensive as all getout, too. There was an article on Yahoo the other day with quotes from GM’s talking about how pretty much every team has the same problems, just some worse than others. And the teams that don’t have those problems are going to be charging an arm and a leg to send help. Frankly, it looks very bleak. I think we’re just going to have to hope that this team isn’t quite as bad as it looks right now and hope for luck to turn our way a little bit (there is a bit of luck involved in all this losing, you know). Because I just don’t know where the help is going to come from.

    Where is Mac, by the way? I hope he didn’t drive off a bridge.

  172. People expect the fourth worst team in the majors to be the one looking to trade the good players, not try to improve their team. I think we got so bad so fast that when it became totally clear that we stink as a whole and weren’t just in a rotten streak, it was too late to do anything to try to turn this season around. I mean, seriously, has anybody ever gotten this bad this fast? Teams have had bad months, but this is wretched. Especially coming from a team who was supposed to be a contender, and not a second division team.

  173. During the post game wrap up Bobby said that the hit and run was on and Giles must have missed the sign. Like a “good” manager he did give him an excuse and also said “OR” the pitch might have been too low for him to swing at (yeah, right).

    Can we trade him already? Just pathetic.

    This game actually gave me hives. Well, actually, it was probably the MSG in the Chinese food I had for dinner, but what the heck, gotta blame somethin’.

  174. Since we seem to have fallen into some time warp and returned to the 80s, I suggest we all start posting what 80s tunes we’ll be listening to. I’ll start with some Duran Duran, “Girls On Film” (possible bullpen theme song to be played during ESPN “highlights?”).

  175. “Wake me up!
    “There must be something better than this!”
    -Elvis Costello, “The River in Reverse”

    Not really where to go with this, other than to say…

    I was with my girl at my favorite Long Island Mexican restaurant tonight &, I swear, I watched that game tonight like it had playoff implications. Something about 10 straight really poked a hole in me.

    And, truthfully, when Frenchy authored that weak flyout to right in the 8th, I officially felt like breaking shit.

    I know it’s not so Zen-like & it accomplishes nothing, but I’m gonna take it out on something if they don’t take one lousy game from Tampa before they show up here in NYC. I’ve got tix to all 3 at Yankee Stadium. I’m entertaining friends from Georgia, including one who works at Turner Field (bad karma?), and I need some relief.

    I do not wanna end up like some whiner Cub fan. And Lord knows, I’ve had all the tequila I need.

    Please, please, please, win one game before Monday.

    Of course, it didn’t bother me so much until the bullpen showed up & pulled their rote gag-o-rama.

  176. Tonight was like a playoff game. I have to admit- I was probably more into it than any game this year.

    I saw some life tonight.

    Its time to throw it out there-

    Atlanta Braves- Champs in 06!*

    *Champs of losing.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *