So AAR asks me to do a recap â€œfor old timesâ€™ sake.â€ How can I refuse? I start to thinking about â€œold times sake,â€ the Braves, and how much I loathe Chip Caray. OK. The last part wasnâ€™t really necessary, but I havenâ€™t been the most devoted Braves fan this year, and Caray is partly responsible. And the thing that bothers me most about him is a thing that doesnâ€™t seem to bother anyone else: how many times he starts a sentence â€œLetâ€™s see ifâ€¦â€ It is my White Whale. So, for old timesâ€™ sake, I create a drinking game: I will take a drink whenever Chip Caray begins a sentence â€œLetâ€™s see ifâ€¦â€ Yes, I know. Iâ€™m 61 years old and drinking games are for amateurs, not professionals like me. But itâ€™s for old timesâ€™ sake, and when I was in college I was participating in drinking games and the Braves were losing 100 games or so a year.
But Iâ€™m going to report on the game as well, so hereâ€™s my log.
Philliesâ€™ first run scores with the ball not leaving the infield. Well, it did, but only from the strong arm of Kurt Suzuki. Reminds of Dale Murphyâ€™s time as a catcher, when he threw three balls into center field and his father told him: â€œDale, if theyâ€™d have been trying to steal center field youâ€™d have had them every time.â€ Suzuki threw a ball six feet over Freddie Freemanâ€™s head from 90 feet away.
Top 2: â€œLet’s see if Camargo can turn around a 1-0 game here in the second.â€ (answer: no)
Bottom 2: â€œLet’s see if Julio can help himself at the plate.â€ (answer: no)
Top 4: â€œLet’s see if Matt (Kemp) is able to continue.â€ (answer: no)
Bottom 4: â€œLet’s see if Julio can pitch around a leadoff error.â€ (answer: yes)
Top 5: â€œLet’s see if Ender can stop carrying his hands with him.â€ (answer: who knows, but he doubled and seems to have taken his hands with him to 2nd base. This had to do with a Simpson inscrutable comment on Enderâ€™s previous at bat.)
Then Julio began to give up homersâ€¦ and a few throws went awry and, well Iâ€™d already had 4 pretty stiff drinks and pretty soon it was 8-0, as Chip Carayâ€™s dad said, at the bottom of another fifth. I hate this ballpark, but Blantonâ€™s Bourbon is pretty damn good.
Then the game got a little woozy. Something called Hoby Milner started pitching for the Phillies. I think he was in Adam 12, but Iâ€™m dating myself again, and Iâ€™m not the best date.
Anyway, it got a little difficult to keep track of the â€œLetâ€™s see ifâ€¦â€ Thatâ€™s the great thing about drinking games: theyâ€™re inherently self-limiting. Plus it started rainingâ€¦ (in Philly.)
We get to the 7th and Suzuki hits a homerâ€¦.Then Rodriguez. Did I mention I hate this ballpark?
So at that point either Chip gave up trying to hype a comeback or Iâ€™d lost all sensibility. The drinking game was over and it was time for serious drinking to begin. The final was 10-3. For old timeâ€™s sake.
Beautiful, thank you.
Thanks JonathanF, much more entertaining than Julios fifth.
the thought reoccurs
are they deserving of our slurs?
our emotional baggage
we place there ourselves, or so goes the adage.
where have your travels taken you today? what’s the trade skinny on caddie talk?
Jonathan — Let’s see if you can do some more recaps for old times sake.
You made a horrific game fun to read about!
Brilliant, JonathanF. More, please.
Some games my Braves truly suck.
“I’m dating myself again, and I’m not the best date” is a beautiful sentence. May I steal it? If it gets the applause it deserves, I promise to give you credit.
Suzuki would be a good fit for the Cubs. But would the Braves get much in return?
Much more entertaining than that game deserved. Thanks, Jonathan!
Somebody (likely a Fox Sports South executive of some sort) should walk up to Chip Caray and say, “Let’s see if you can go an entire game without saying ‘let’s see if…'”
Let’s see if JonathanF does another great recap soon… ::ducks::
It’s kind of jarring to think there is a person who could be combined with Skip Caray to create Chip Caray.
I wonder why the Braves haven’t traded international bonus pool money for something of value yet. Aren’t we running out of opportunities to “spend” that money?
I hope we don’t trade an everyday player for a guy that pitches one ever 5 days I would hate to see a acuna or Albee’s go in any trade
Lane Adams is back up with Kemp going on the DL with his hamstring.
@4 blazon, back in switzerland for a few days after ten days in NY and CT. Well, you tell me, I have nothing. He’s been working as a commentator during The Open? So – what’s next??
Wasted opportunities abound.
Ronald Acuna is 4-4 tonight and needs a triple for the cycle. Albies didn’t start and AAAA pitcher Wisler had a decent outing
Freddie is a third baseman.
Freddie’s good at baseball. Acuna might be too.
Freeman can play third!
Sure we can’t keep him there?
Jim Johnson is not a major league closer.
Jim Johnson, you disappoint but do not surprise.
At this point, this is on Snitker. He’s blown 8 saves, for crying out loud. Make an adjustment, manager.
I knew all those runners left in scoring position was gonna come back to haunt .. Inciarte should have been on 3rd .. wasted at bat by Phillips ..
I hate Jim Johnson
I keep hearing that Jim Johnson is on the trade block. Who would trade anything of value to bring Mr. Blown Save into their bullpen?
Our Chip off the old block just said JJ leads the bigs in blown saves. Someone must, so it may as well be Jim.
This will be yet another time where we lose to the worst team in baseball in their last at bat.
This team is obviously hard to figure out, as are most .500-ish teams, I would imagine. But the fact that we can’t beat the MFing Phillies is really starting to piss me off.
Also, Chip and Joe were talking about how we were just 1-for-12 with runners in scoring position, so it’s not all on Johnson. That’s true, so far as it goes, but the two facts have very little to do with each other. All Johnson had to do was his freaking job and we’d have won anyway.
well thats 6 balls that Carmargo and Adams swung at and missed .. too impatient .. Camargo swings at 1st pitch everytime … this game was lost with all the runners LOB
The Phillies are really starting to heat up.
Snitker should get the blown save. Just so damn stupid
Remember when we had a glimmer of (false) playoff hopes a couple weeks ago? lol
22 men LOB .. s rodriguez has no business out there … 4 k’s .. really .. left 7 men on base … he wasnt hittng in the minor leagues and we bring him up .. stupid … id rather have Jace Peterson .. now ourbench is back to being bad … johnson, rodriguez and adams ?? then santana … camargo swings at everything .. never walks
recapped at close past the midnight hour…tears are quenched, hope renewed but like Jonathan F i need a drink.