Arizona Diamondbacks vs. Atlanta Braves – Box Score – May 16, 2009 – ESPN

Well, that’s one way to rest your good relievers.

Didn’t start off so badly. In the bottom of the first, Escobar and Chipper singled with one out, first and third. But then Chipper, inexplicably, fell for the stupid fake-throw-to-third-throw-back-to-first play and got picked off. Yunel, inexplicably except that this is Yunel, figured, “Hey, I’ve got to get some of that,” and took off too, and both were out. Seriously, how often do you see a double play with no pitch? The game thread guy didn’t even know how to record it.

And then things pretty much fell apart. Kawakami’s line doesn’t look so bad — five innings, three runs on five hits, one walk, four strikeouts. But 1) four of the five hits were for extra bases, three doubles and a triple; 2) the D-Backs are an extremely poor offensive team (though you wouldn’t have known it tonight); and 3) Kawakami was throwing slop, rarely topping 88.

The offense rarely threatened, but it was still only 3-0 when the bullpen struck. Parr, after getting through the sixth easily, walked the first two in the seventh, and when he seemed likely to get out of it gave up a triple to make it 5-0 and put the game away. The indescribably awful Jeff Bennett pitched the eighth with his specialty of walking everybody, or at least four of the seven men he faced. And Buddy Carlyle, who can only be described as “even worse than Bennett,” came up with his specialty of giving up a grand slam — a Devinian second in as many outings — after having already walked in a run and allowed another on a single.

Make no mistake, this is a really bad offensive team that just scored twelve runs against us. Batting average is overrated, yes, but they had a cleanup hitter who came into the game hitting .231, a #5 hitter at .241, and the next three guys at .200, .206, and .200. The last three without any power. Playing their home games in an extreme hitter’s park. It’s pathetic.