West Coast Wakeup Call: Padres 12

So I have to be honest. I’m still not stretched out. So my normal nostalgical-statistical-humorilogical intro is not yet in my skill set. It will be. Just bear with me. In lieu of that, I came across an interesting story this week about John Malone. As I’ve told y’all many times in the past, Malone only owns the Braves because he wanted to limit his tax bill, and he runs the Braves, and his life, in such a way as to keep his tax bill small as possible. He has literally no other interests… least of all baseball.

Anyway, as Wall Street Journal put it:

The case stems from international tax rules created by Congress in 2017 aimed at making it easier for U.S. companies to repatriate foreign profits. Congress subjected accumulated past foreign profits to a one-time tax as part of a transition to the new system. It then imposed a minimum tax on new foreign profits and created a new deduction so foreign profits beyond that minimum tax were effectively tax-free for U.S. companies.

But Congress set the effective dates for those different tax rules in ways that didn’t match up, so companies could get different results depending on when their foreign subsidiaries’ fiscal years ended. In some cases, this mismatch let companies generate foreign profits that qualified for the new tax deduction but weren’t yet subject to the minimum tax.

Liberty Global profited from that gap with an internal transaction it called “Project Soy,” according to a government filing that described a “highly engineered tax scheme” that required the signoff of John Malone, the billionaire and longtime chairman of the broader Liberty Global PLC. The government cited internal corporate emails showing that executives were aware of the gap in the law and that the Treasury Department might later close it.

If there were a tax break under which the World Series champ’s owners owed no taxes for a year, the Braves would literally never lose.

So we’re on the road and we’re in San Diego, one of the most enjoyable parks I ever went to. And what is it about baseball players and two-wheeled vehicles? Between Ron Gant, Jeff Kent, and, now Fernando Tatis Jr., there seems to be a problem with baseball players and the need for speed. (OK. I’m not sure three accidents in 40 years should really count as much of a trend, but I’m allowed to create whatever categories I want… It’s in the blogger’s handbook.)

Rule 2.00 of baseball states that if one team doesn’t show up, the other team wins 9-0.  Let’s just say that’s what happened. Nope… we can’t say that because the Braves did worse than they would have done by literally not showing up at all.

Charlie Morton did not pitch well. He loaded the bases in the first inning with two hit batsmen and a single. He then made Luke Voit look bad, but a two out single by Eric Hosmer plated two and a single from Wil Myers scored one more. A homer by CJ (‘don’t call me JJ’ – see below) Abrams made it 4-0. A somewhat nonaggressive charge from Marcel Ozuna on a fly ball made it 5-0. But Morton threw 95 pitches in 5 innings, so maybe he’s ready to start the season now.

Newk came out next and does what he does: frustrate the guys who pay him.

Then there’s the offense. It was offensive. I was certainly offended. Defense? How about a dropped fly ball by Rosario? Or a dropped throw by Olson?

So what’s the good news? Well, after five hits, Manny Machado is probably worn out. Ozzie was rumored to have homered in the 9th, but I’m not including it in the headline because it makes the game look even more futile.


Yep… He called CJ Abrams JJ Abrams when Ozuna grounded out in the second. Rewound and listened three times just to assure myself that I hadn’t slandered Chip. JJ Abrams’ production company is named Bad Robot. No one worse, or more robotically predictable, than our Chip.

In perhaps the stupidest stat I’ve heard in some time, Chip announced that since 2019, the Braves are 8-8 in the games following a game in which the opponent scored 11 or more runs. It’s really rare for a stat to be almost completely uninformative. Kudos.

Author: JonathanF

Alive since 1956. Braves fan since 1966. The first ten years were pretty much wasted. Exiled to Yankees/Mets territory in 1974 --- bearable only with TBS followed by MLB.TV.

34 thoughts on “West Coast Wakeup Call: Padres 12”

  1. Oh boy, already some memorable Chip moments this season! I’m happy to see the completely uninformative stats haven’t stopped.

    I want to see this tomorrow, even though I know it probably won’t happen:
    LF Ozuna, CF Duvall, RF Heredia
    SS Arcia, DH Dickerson
    Dansby and Rosario on the bench; let them rest and reset. They’ve been awful; Dansby’s offense (more like “awf(ul)ense”) is a massive liability, since he’s striking out 50% of the time right now, and Rosario’s been cold offensively AND looked pretty bad in the outfield. Give those two a break; Freddie’s not here; give those two a break.
    (And then Riley, Albies, Olson as normal.)

  2. Despite your disclaimers, JonathanF, your season is off to a much better start than our Bravos.

  3. Hitters have bad weeks. I’d keep running them out there. Hitters had a short spring training too.

  4. Playing devil’s advocate, I wasn’t watching the game and so don’t know how Chip explained his stat, but I could see an announcer saying something like, “The few unfortunate viewers we have left at this point of the game, if they’re still sober, (ok, that sounds more like Skip than Chip) might be wondering whether being blown out like this affects the team the next day. Maybe using lots of relievers in a big loss overworks your bullpen. On the other hand, maybe you gave up lots of runs because your better pitchers weren’t pitching, and they pitch the next day. There’s a fastball high for ball two. Since 2019, after games in which the Braves gave up 11 or more runs, the team is 8-8. You would expect them to have been somewhere around 9-7, give or take a couple of wins, so that record doesn’t make it look like getting blown out makes a difference the next day. Ball three, outside.” I’m sure there’s a smoother way to phrase it, but if you’re an announcer trying to fill time, that might be a reasonable thing to discuss. Then your color guy could come up with other possible reasons (the team bearing down after a big loss, or a loss being so big that players relax as opposed to losing a stressful extra-inning game), and you could say that all those may be true, but that it looks like they cancel each other out or something. I’d rather hear something like that than a discussion of which San Diego restaurant they’re going to after the game or how their kids are doing.

  5. Better recap than it deserved, JohnathanF.
    I will admit I enjoyed the last inning of last nights game, when Chip sarcastically made fun of Machado when he didn’t go 6-6. And yelling “Take that”! As soon as Ozzie hit his HR.

  6. Royber Salinas struck out 13 in 5 innings for Augusta yesterday. Who is he? 24K’s in 9IP this season.

    Yes, World Series hangover indeed. Wright vs Gore tonight should be fun to watch. Go Braves!

  7. @8
    I’m trying to find that out, but those numbers cannot be ignored no matter how early it is in the season.

    Agreed. Newk needs to go. Braves don’t need him and haven’t really needed him since he dropped out of the rotation. It’s better for both parties if he goes elsewhere. I still have a hard time believing he’s not tradable. He’s been awful, but he is a former 1st rounder that can hit 100 as a LHP. Teams that royally suck would trade a low level prospect for that.

    On the rest, the Braves don’t have much choice but continue running it out there and hope Eddie and the like turn around. Benching isn’t a solution.

  8. @5: Nice try. However: (a) there was no motivation at all. Chip just blurted it out, and the TWO color guys had nothing to say about it; (b) we agree that the stat is uninformative, but why “11 runs or more”? Why “since 2019”? Someone asked someone to calculate exactly what you said, and they came up with some unmotivated meaningless lazy count. And they gave it to Chip, and he just said it without any stop anywhere in his cerebrum; (c) sure, it was late and they had run out of things to talk about, but that’s when you use actual talent to interest the few people still listening…. unless you don’t have any.

  9. My guess is that it was the Braves’ production truck crew equivalent to replacing Creed’s apple with a potato.

  10. We are so lacking in continuing the continuum…

    Others laugh shrilly, hector, weep, get very very angry… but

    they continue to post..

    in the hundreds on occasions…

    supposedly we feel all those things too…

    but a collective one post an hour hardly suggests passion…

    let alone helpful, creative suggestions…

    the need, yes, is desperate…

    passion, is it already spent?

    say so…or deny it…at some length.

  11. @15


    ….and often!

    “Bare ruined choirs, where late the sweet birds sang.”



    The Mets have just clobbered the Diamonbacks 10-2.

    Interestingly they appear to have done so in front of a crowd larger than we saw in the Bronx a few days ago in a so called Division Match Up.

    Which begs the question…

    O/U attendance SECOND game we comeback off the road? Sentimentality would still rule the first.

    18, 500…given just a little drip of rain!

  13. Bill James did a good study once on W/L records of teams on the first game of a West Coast trip. I always expect listlessness and a loss.

    Newcomb is just a mop up man at this point. I’m sure he’ll be used hard and then released.

  14. I think Rosario needs to go back to LF or go to DH with Ozuna at the other position, while Heredia plays RF until Acuña is ready. It’s clear Rosario can’t handle RF. Maybe that’s the plan from here, I don’t know.

  15. Where are the Sinbas of yesteryear? Traded for Newcombs every one.

    But oh! Dansby has made us forget Andrelton, hasn’t he?

  16. Even though he got away with a hanging curveball for the second K, I’m enjoying this version of Wright.

  17. Is this MacKenzie Gore’s debut? He was a top draft pick and top prospect. This will probably be another tough game.

  18. What an outing for Wright! 9K through 5 IP. Hard to ask for more than that from such a young guy. Now if only the Braves could hit a couple long balls… you heard it here first, Duvall is going deep in the top of the 7th!

  19. @30 – You were a little off on your prediction, but I’ll take a 2 run double every day of the week. Nice prediction.

  20. @30 Very good prediction. Good win tonight. That was more like it.

    Could be famous last words, but I have been very impressed with Wright. This could be a breakout year for him.

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