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Make up your own joke game thread: Sept. 17, Phillies at Braves
September 17, 2008
I am not continuing the conceit but rest assured I still think Francoeur is a giant whiny baby game thread: July 25, Braves at Phillies
July 25, 2008
- Nathan on Escaping the Malaise: Braves 4, Kaiser’s Non Permanentes 2
- JonathanF on Escaping the Malaise: Braves 4, Kaiser’s Non Permanentes 2
- Cliff on Athletics 2, Did the Braves Know They Had a Game Yesterday?
- YaramahZ on Athletics 2, Did the Braves Know They Had a Game Yesterday?
- Our new insect overlords on Athletics 2, Did the Braves Know They Had a Game Yesterday?
I predict the Braves score 4 runs in the top of the first. With 2 outs, Hampton comes to bat. He hits a swinging bunt and breaks his big toe on the bag trying to beat it out and goes on the DL without having thrown a pitch.
Over/Under on how many innings he lasts as a starter before getting hurt.
My friend said 13.5
Im saying 4.5
Poor Hampton. Even if he pitches great today, he still won’t win with the anemic Braves’ offense going against Hamels. Hamels will probably throw his third (in three trys) complete game against the Braves this season today.
Also, I’d say there is a 95% chance of a Martin Prado sighting at second base today. Make bad even worse, Bobby.
I wonder if he does get hurt again, will it be like a pulled muscle, or will it be something cool, like
sliding into second he twists his ankle, or, he trys to bunt nad breaks his finger by holding the bat wrong, or a homerun is hit, the fireworks go off and he gets a concussion from the blast?
pretty smart move here; sacrifice the game against hamels (we just cannot hit him) by pitching the experiment, and try and sneak out a series win with Sunday’s game).
I really hope Hampton does well, all kidding aside. It would be a major boost, but I’m not going to hold my breath.
This just in, Hampton out for the season after spontaneously combusting in his sleep.
Well, it’s a 3:55 start, so we can play guess the Hampton injury time!
I’ll guess 3:37.
I’m telling you — perfect game, injured in the celebration.
I’ll take that Mac, it’d be more than what he’s done the last 3 years, at least we’d get something out of it.
Or: Hits first inning grand slam, injured when he trips over third base.
Or he could break his jaw or dislocate his lips will doing some snuff….
Hopefully he won’t break his arm throwing pickoff throws to first today.
But seriously, go Braves, and go Hampton.
I predict he leaves the game early, and not because he is injured.
I predict that Jeff Porter plays second, so he can be closer to Hampton in case anything happens.
Casey Blake to the Dodgers.
I too predict that Hampton leaves the game early and not because of an injury of any sort.
Casey Blake to the Dodgers? What’d they give up? I can’t access mainstream internet sites because of the filters at my job. Freakin’ Best Buy…
On the season, McCann, a catcher, now has a higher OPS than C. Utley, R. Howard, H. Ramirez, D. Uggla, D. Wright, C. Beltran, R. Braun, A. Dunn, J.D. Drew, Manny, etc. (…he’s even 37 points higher than Josh “Achilles” Hamilton.)
In fact, at .951, he’s now 9th in all of baseball behind only L. Berkman, C. Jones, A. Pujols, M. Bradley, M. Holliday, A. Rod, P. Burrell, & R. Ludwick…the best of the best.
According to MLBTradeRumors.com, it’s Casey Blake to the Dodgers for minor-league catcher Carlos Santana, pitcher Jon Meloan and cash.
Dan beat me to it.
Those numbers for McCann are even more impressive than I’d have thought. Thanks for posting that, Douglass.
Well, it’s happened
Hampton injured falling down stairs; likely out for season
I got it. He has to leave the park before the first inning because his wife is rushed to the hospital after being cut while framing the lineup card.
I want yall to know I am literally posting from the braves bullpen at citizens bank park. I am waiting to see this for my own eyes. I won’t believe it til I see it. No activity yet but ill let yall know when hampton comes out.
exellent andrew, excellent.
Every war room needs eyes on the ground.
Prado starting at second base. Kelly Johnson, hitting something like .320
against left handers, has yet to see Cole Hamels this season.
Bobby continues to try the same thing, starting Prado at second, because you know, it worked so well against the Phillies the other two times the Braves have played them with Hamels starting.
That really is bulletpoint 1A on the “Things Bobby has repeatedly done wrong this year” list.
Though I’m sure it makes ricflair happy.
IT’S A FREE COUNTRY LOVE IT OR A LEAVE IT!!!!111one
Of course, “Not facing Cole Hamels” is a good beginning for hitting .320 against lefthanders.
That’s a fair point about Kelly’s average against lefty’s but the main reason you shouldn’t regularly platoon KJ and Prado in my eyes is Prado’s atrocious defense.
“Getting to Know Brian McCann” on the Fox pre-game show: Brian McCann likes Saved by the Bell, 24, and Mexican food — soft tacos, burritos, and cheese dip.
Having just come back from eating Mexican food for lunch, I heartily approve the sentiment.
Ok. I can report he walked up the bullpen steps without incident. Also took 10-12 throws from the bullpen mound. So far all without an injury. I’m headed to my seat now.
On a side note, some dude was riding hampton, yelling all kinds of stuff and roger mcdowell just looked up and goes “het fat boy, whens the last time you laid off a hamburger?”. Pretty classic.
Great line by McDowell! Thanks for the update, Andrew.
Anyone else blacked out on MLB.TV? Anyone know a way around it?
I would love to see this game.
If he’s gonna injure himself, he better do it now.
I bet on the first pitch of the game, whoever’s leading off will line a foul ball into the dugout and hit hampton
All Fox saturday games are blacked out on mlb.tv and extra-innings.
I guess I forgot, I haven’t been around for a Saturday game in a while.
What is Ohman thinking
this is hilarious
“recently up from the minor leagues where he found his swing batting 6th Jeff Francoeur. He says it some kind of chicken wing thing, I dont know.”
well there goes my prediction
I hereby promise to never say a negative word about Roger McDowell for the rest of my life, unless he commits some sort of crime.
That’s just awesome.
Will Ohman with a strong showing in the pregame introductions. Perhaps that performance will net us a better prospect when he’s traded.
Add Bob Davidson to the list of umpires needlessly pissed off by Secular Ebony by heading to first prematurely on a called strike.
Someone needs to explain to this announcer on FOX that the purpose of selling is not to get better this year.
Ohman is definitely getting traded now, if he wasn’t before. Good way to go, though.
Ok, this is his last chance to injure himself before the game starts… don’t give up hope yet
all that stands between Hampton and pitching is 7 warmup pitches and a chalk line–I bet on the chalk line
He actually threw a pitch!
And hell freezes over
Oh my God, it happened.
Just so everyone who is blacked out can see…this website has the stream somehow.
and he pitches the first pitch without incident. We can no longer say he hasn’t pitched in nearly 3 years
the critics are silent
Well, we can still say that he hasn’t pitched in a meaningful game in three years.
I am so happy that I got to witness Rollins’ streak end.
How does Rollins get caught for the first time in ’08 by McCann and Hampton as a battery? Long odds.
McCann the Man!
You wouldn’t know that from listening to this Fox Broadcast. I understand that in these weekly broadcasts, the networks like to play up the storylines to make the game seem more dramatic and meaningful.
But this is just ridiculous. That opening segment about how we should be buyers…”I don’t see what you could gain by trading Teixeira”(regardless of how you feel on the issue, cooome on.)…they’re only six and half back, how could they be sellers?…and then just now, they flash a graphic saying that the braves comeback chances depend on how Hampton pitches.
That’s just shitty, network driven commentary. Oh how I hate playing on Fox.
Great throw and leadoff single by B-Mac!
McCann is awesome. I feel like, despite the lovefest today, that does not get said often enough for a 24 (!!) year old catcher locked up long-term who is in the top ten in the league in extra-base hits and OPS+.
McCann debuts on my top 44 list this year… and he keeps moving up.
That’s Our Jeffy!™
Francoeur sucks, but at least he ran out the groundball.
Obviously, anyone who spells “McCutcheon” “McCutchen” was born to be an evil Yankee.
Left-handed McCann gets hit off left-hander Cole Hamels.
After that, three consecutive right-handers (Infante, Francoeur and Prado) made outs against Hamels.
Bobby Cox’s brain does not compute.
i’ve never seen a free live video feed. i have mlbtv and the game is blacked out for me. thanks ryan for the link.
That sounded like a sexual reference, “Ryan Howard can play on my team any day of the week”.
Eric Karros can give me a better appreciation of Joe Simpson any day of the week.
Eric “I’m the reason Mike Piazza stayed at catcher even though he couldn’t really catch” Karros.
Good time for his first ground ball.
Eric Karros: Teaching Little Leaguers how to cheat since 2008.
And now, the grand slam.
that was a good pitch.
I’m way more excited to see Hampton hit than pitch
Yah that’s a let down
I was pretty excited to see Hampton swinging too. I was just hoping he didn’t hurt himself swinging the bat.
Is it me or does Hampton look thinner?
2 on no out. we better get something quick before francoeur gets a chance to kill the rally.
I ♥ Brian McCann.
So THAT’s what clutch hitting looks like.
francoeur at least cant hit into a double play…well, i hope not. nice hit infante.
Wow, according to the FOX broadcast Mac is one of only three catchers to have 3 consecutive 20 homer seasons at his age. Which is great until you remember he only had 18 last year.
“[McCann’s] got power AND speed!” – moron on Fox
wowey! a lead on hamels.
Wow, this is great.
I think the Fox guy was kidding. He did mention that his career high is 3 SBs.
Either way, I don’t like him much.
This is fantastic.
This inning rocks–the Phillies look like the Braves of the 1970s….
You got to love Rollins not even trying to catch it. That was waay off.
what team am I watching, I love this
Hamels throw to 2nd was one of the worst throws Ive ever seen. At least 10-15 feet to the left of 2nd base
We are actually out-managing someone. This is FUN again. Buy, and buy now… 🙂
holy matrimony batman. what’s going on?
This is unbelievable how quick this is all happening.
I love Chipper laughing at the Phillies in the dugout.
is that some positivity or some sarcasm? either way, i like it.
This is great
Hoping they go into the bullpen before Hamels gets it together and no-hits the Braves for the rest of the game.
Best half inning we’ve had in a while… All around good play.
The TV and radio are almost in sync. Only problem is that Joe is doing the radio. He has taken it upon himself to do both play-by-play and color.
This is awesome.
The Fox guys called it!!
suck it hamels
Tex with a big shot!
Are we buyers now?
hells yeah…kickin’ cole’s hammy ass.
But let us not lose sight of the need to sell.
It’s just a game and I was an ass. Apology accepted???
Did Teixeira say, “That just happened!” ?????
@78 – I guess not.
#111 – No, just getting Tex’s value up and trying to mess up the Phils season
#115 – yes he did
Does this mean that Mike Hampton may actually.. get a win?
Where am I?
it’s cool. life wouldnt be too easy if someone didnt challenge your thought processes every now and again.
cmon Hampton get through 5
I take a shower, down 3-0. I come out, it’s 9-3.
Maybe I should head back into the shower.
Hampton still has to get through at least two more innings.
If the Braves sweep this series, they’re not selling…even if it’s still hopeless. They may just stand pat, but they will not sell.
The good news: The Braves will now go on a huge run and win the division.
The bad news: By the end of the season, UBubba will be a giant prune.
How many runs had we scored of Hammels this entire season before that inning? Anyone know off the top of their head?
Use a gentle soap, ububba. Jergens maybe.
If only four of the nine runs were ‘earned,’ does that mean Teixeira didn’t ‘earn’ the home run? Also, one of those errors was Hamels’. I say this because earned runs are stupid.
I think I’d like to retroactively create the Hampton Injury Curse to explain how poorly the Braves had played since he first got injured. I am confident they will never lose a game again.
Ububba, stay in the shower just in case.
I can’t stop grinning!
Eaton has nothing on the ball. I guarantee you I could hit the ball into play off this guy. His fastball was just 79 a couple pitches ago.
Did the Phillies not get the memo that Jeffy can’t hit high and inside pitches?
Frenchy with hit!!!! He’s back. Whoooooooo!!!!!
Dumbest player in major league baseball. Sorry, he just is.
At least Francoeur is still a moron.
What’s that well known rule? Oh yeah, never make the first or third out at third base. Good job, Jeff.
Especially on a play that requires only about a 60-foot throw…
It’s like waiting for Chris Farley to fall down.
Rules, shmules. It’s Jeff Francouer! He can do anything!
If that stupid baserunning error ends up costing us this game, I will personally strangle Francouer.
I bet Francoeur couldn’t name one baseball cardinal sin if you asked him.
Royce Ring–He truly sucks….
That was some pretty big failure by Ring.
Oh my, they’re blowing it.
Cardinal Sins of Baseball according to Francouer:
1) Not swinging.
2) Hiding your true feelings.
I will break something if we blow this game
My God. Chris Coste.
This is going to be one of those 15-14 type games where every player is used and crazy things start happening.
Lord have mercy on us…
Well, at least we can be sure that we’re selling.
Nice work, guys.
*sigh* we’re gonna lose.
Ugh!!….This inning truly sucks…
Sell. And put Boyer out to pasture.
Wow they really suck.
All those 7-2 games Boyer pitched finally caught up.
Thanks, Bobby. Now retire.
SELL, SELL, SELL, SELL, SELL!!
Pretty predictable on a hot day in Philly. But I bet the Braves don’t score again and lose something like 15-9. It’s not every day and every team that has a nine-run inning and loses.
can you really do anything more than laugh at this??? geez, this team sucks and like I’ve said for the last two weeks – sell, sell, sell…
Hope whatever you broke wasn’t valuable, Alzheimers.
Let’s all agree to blame Francoeur.
This park is a bandbox, but 20 PH already is pretty damned impressive for Dobbs.
Get back in the shower!
That baserunning blunder was egregious to quote Reese Bobby.
When you’re 2-8 against this team and they’re sitting up there taking BP, it might be time to send a message and loosen these guys up a bit. But that’s not the “braves way”. Dobbs hit that ball about 500 feet and he was just sitting comfortably waiting a fastball from Boyer.
Guys like Cost, Mike Redmond and others have always been Braves killers, with no recourse from the Braves. I’d move those guys back every now and then.
I’m gonna make a really nerdy reference here, but I think we just got beaten by Dobbs’s Original Slack.
It is indescribable how much I’d rather have Infante up here than Frenchy.
… aaaand, dammit.
Three walks and the Braves don’t score.
The Braves have to be the worst team in the league with the bases loaded.
Our boy Frenchy leading off the seventh…
I think his eyesight really must be terrible. Can they give him another eye exam?
The Braves without Frenchy are actually near or over 300 with the bases loaded, but Frenchy is something like 2 for 18. So it just seems like we’re terrible with the bases juiced. It’s just a Frenchy illusion.
And that was a woefully sad swing Frenchy put on that ball.
Jeff Francoeur at the plate with the bases loaded reminds me of Bill Murray in Groundhog Day.
This team will NEVER put together a ten win stretch because Bobby pitches his top relievers in every game whether down by two or up by ten. Use your entire bullpen or send them down!!!!
Shower trick doesn’t work for me.
I remember why we like this Soriano fellow.
Seriously, when did this game start to go downhill? AT THE VERY INSTANT Francoeur got thrown out at third for no reason. I’m thisclose to blaming him for the Kennedy Assassination. Or possibly the Lincoln Assassination. Why not?
is chipper available to pinch hit?
178 – I have heard that this may be a bigger issue than people are making of it. If he can’t see the seams of the baseball he has no idea what pitch is coming. If this is true, his career is over.
What was wrong with Bobby’s bullpen use today? These are must win games put out your best
my 7 year old: “Why did Cox have to put in Boyer?”
not bad for a kid, though a better question would be why didn’t he bring the hook before the lead was pissed away
Hampton pitched–it was bound to be a weird game
9 runs in one inning. 3 walks in another inning. and we lose. teixeira and ohman should start saying their goodbyes. let’s hope posada doesn’t make it back so yankees have a 1b/dh spot open
Recap is up. Die, Jeffy.