Atlanta Braves vs. New York Mets – Box Score – August 26, 2011 – ESPN.

What an embarrassment. The Braves were dominated — no, humiliated — by Chris Capuano, a rag-armed mopup man who is only starting because, hey, Mets.

Of course, he is a lefty.

Capuano was perfect through four, and because the first baserunner — Dan Uggla, who had a broken-bat single — was erased on a dispiriting double play, he faced the minimum through seven and two-thirds, when David Ross doubled. And that was it. On his way to a complete-game victory, Capuano struck out thirteen Braves, which is the equivalent of Randy Johnson striking out 37 men in a standard nine-inning game. Michael Bourn took the golden sombrero, but then he was the only one who had a chance to bat four times. Lord, was it awful.

It’s easy to say that Tim Hudson didn’t pitch so badly, since he gave up four runs, two of them inherited (more on that in a minute) but he really didn’t pitch well at all, it’s just, well, Mets. In six and a third, he gave up eleven hits and three walks, and that the Mets only got hits with runners in scoring position against him in the fifth, well, that’s not a repeatable skill and I’ll leave it at that.

Anyway, in the seventh he gave up a couple of baserunners, and Fredi went with Sherrill, about which, okay, but after he got one out in comes… Scott Linebrink? Did I mention that we have the next three days off? Linebrink, typically, gave up a two-run double. Then in the eighth, in comes Venters, because Fredi is stupid. And Venters gave up his first two runs in about two months, because what the hell?