In the magic of the moonlight we briefly saw the skeletons come to life. Jeff Francoeur and Kelly Johnson each hit a ball far enough to land BEYOND the outfield fence. That is called a “home run.” Who knew?

But Williams Perez seemed like he spent too much time in Tortuga. His schtick seems to really work about 1 out of 5 games. It barely gets by one more time. And, it gets hammered the other three. Actually, if he pitched for the 1995 Indians, he would be a credible pitcher. As long as you can count on your side getting 5 to 8 each night, hey, he might win 20. But when it is 3 to 0 after 1, you figure these Barves are headed for Davy Jones locker.

And if it had stayed 3 on the Pirates side, ACTUALLY the Barves could have recovered. BUT, the doubly named starter gave up 2 more in the third inning. Well, really a lot of those runs originated with the statues formerly known as Erick Aybar and Kelly Johnson. Note to Fredi: When you have a ground ball pitcher pitching, you need people in the field that can get to ground balls. BUT, if it had stayed at 5, even then these Barves on this rare moonlit night, could have reached that. But no, our Bills gave up one more in the 6th.

After which there came the most magical and mystical experience. The skeletons came to life. I saw it. Somehow a lefthander was pitching to Jeff Francoeur. By such move Clint Hurdle turned Pee Wee Herman into Scotty Smalls (the protagonist/ narrator in “The Sandlot”). And Scotty tagged one to make it 6 to 2. Was there more magic in the moonlight? Should we bring out Moonlight Graham (his ghost is a better batter, after all)?

But no, the Barves returned to “Blue Lagoon Island” and found their stash of rum. But, in so doing, they didn’t see anything as hot as Keira Knightley. So, another run scored. But then, they Barved up 2 more, thus giving us our final score.

This is the second game in which the Barves hit 2 home runs. I wonder how many more will pass. Will Captain Barbarossa take the treasure again or will Captain Fredi Sparrow accidentally create a “win.” The 3 sequels have already been put in the can, so we can watch if we want to for the exciting moments here and there, but we can’t change fate.