So, in an effort to help the Braves, I went back to reread the baseball rules to see if I could spot something that Fredi et al. had missed. And you know what I found? Apparently there are something called (Dr. Evil Finger Quotations)”runs”(/DEFQ), and that if you have more of these “runs” than your opponent, you get what’s called a “win.” Who knew? I mean, if I, a native English speaker with a post-graduate degree couldn’t figure that out without devoting kabbalahistic levels of study to deciphering the rules, what hope did Fredi have?
Anyway, after firing off a quick carrier pigeon, (no NSA Electronic Interception for something THIS important) I settled down to see if the Braves could do some practical application with the “runs” information.
The game started off poorly, with Williams Perez giving up a first inning “run” although a double play by Martin Prado limited the damage. In the 3rd, the Marlins scored another “run” on a double play, this time Dee Gordon scoring on a Christian Yelich 4-6-3. The last Marlin “run” came in the 5th, when the two double play men atoned for their sins, with Prado doubling in Yelich.
I was worried that the pigeon had been waylaid on the way, but in the 7th, Fredi finally managed to decode my message, with Adonis Garcia doubling in Daniel Castro, followed by Gordon Beckham singling in Freddie Freeman.
Having gotten a taste of “runs” the Braves went wild in the 8th, with Nick Markakis singling in Mallex Smith, followed by Garcia singling in two “runs” and Beckham singling in the final “run.”
The bullpen, unused to all the “runs” made it interesting, with Jim Johnson and Arodys Vizcaino loading the bases with two outs in the bottom of the 8th before getting Marcell Ozuna to strike out, and putting on two in the bottom of the 9th before J.T. Realmuto grounded out to end the game.
So, happy with my small contribution, I will return to my studies to try to fathom out something called a “save,” which we apparently got last night as a result of the “win.” I will keep you posted on my research.
Enthused applause. Bravo, Bravos.
Was Castro better than Aybar at SS?
Bravo, Seat Painter!
Excellent recap!
It is starting to look like Adonis may be for real. Like a possible 2 – 3 WAR guy after accounting for some bad defense.
We need some of our pumpkins to turn into carriages.
@5, You think we could get a 23-year-old, rising-talent, cost-controlled, left-handed, major league starting pitcher for him? And maybe they’d throw in a prospect and a good setup reliever along with him? (We definitely could use one of the latter!)
Castro is an outstanding defensive SS. Obviously he’s not simmons, but he might be Ahmed. The problem is wholly his bat.
@6 – Maybe if he was a couple of years older.
@6 – Only if he was older and was recovering from Tommy John surgery.
@ 7 – Aybar is terrible both offensively and defensively. I know who I would play.
What a beauty. Thank you, Seat Painter..
Mini..UFinish
JT Realmuto
while in Double A on Pluto
Thought it couldn’t be stupider
That Single A ball’s played closer to home in Jupiter.
Apropos of nothing but Mallex Smith is not ready for the majors and is overmatched.
Nick, it’ll look like a 2-RBI line drive in the box score.
I say, chaps, it appears as though these gentlemen have notched two more of these “runs,” as you call them!
And “Bud” Norris has already handed “one” of these “runs” back. Because “he” is a “mediocre” “pitcher” in the “rotation” due to a “lack” of “alternatives” and a “plague” of “quotation marks.”
And a “home run” sets off the “monstrosity” in the Marlins’ “outfield.”
“Bud” is one of many “low-cost warm bodies” on the “roster” due to “budget” that comes with the Braves being a “real estate business” in lieu of a “baseball team.”
We’re gonna hit Texas Leaguers for as long as it takes until we find someone with actual power to drive in runs!
If Andrelton is still in Atlanta, that’s an out.
@5 He has pretty good range. For all the errors, fangraphs has his defense as solid.
There’s a real knock, Mallex!
That’s a line drive, Nick! Seriously, feed this team’s other hitters whatever he’s having for breakfast.
Studly.
Barry Bonds aka Dorian Grey?a shocking transformation physically but in the right direction…himself again, almost back to the days of the Bream Slide, baby face…looks twenty years younger and has arms again rather than fence posts…
god, that stuff must be poison.
I think we’d better start calling Nick Markakis Archie Bunker, because he’s about all of our offense.
Heads up by Beckham there.
Suddenly looking like they know how to play this game!
The Marlins are worse than us!
Beckham just pulled a hammy.
@30: His own?
@31: Presumably.
Great work by Cervenka
almost more perturbed by the hubris it takes to don the #1 jersey and then perform like that.
Shelby Miller pulled after 78 pitches in less than 2 innings.
Interesting.
Go Braves.
Walk-off home run incoming.
Edit: Or not. Nice.
“I’ll walk him. I want Parkman.”
@35: Yahoo says he only threw 50.
JASON!! Break up the Braves! Seriously, some of these guys need to be left down in Miami. I doubt they’ll mind.
Bullpen really gutted that one out. Go Braves.
We may never lose again.
Win, win, win.
@38 – – you are right! I misread the box score. Wonder if Shelby is hurt?
Yes he hurt his hand. Somehow his knuckles dragged the dirt on a release. Just a few cuts
73-9
Recapped, sort of.